All Time Lighw

Ever sit back and take a look at where you are? Just, consider you position right now. Are you satisfied? Are you comfortable? Are you Happy? I sit here and I’m thinking about these big questions, and I find the answer to be, well, complicated.
First off, as a graphic designer I find my work to be, well, unfulfilling. There’s apparently this “recession” thing going on, regardless of what anybody says. That’s right, I said it and a lot of people agree with me. Anyhow, the business that I work for (and don’t usually like in the first place) is lets use the word, expanding, our product lines. No big deal right? You have a job right? All decent questions to ask. However, I realized as I photoshopped out the nipples on yet another, um, let’s go with “Product,” that I realized that I was failing at no fewer than 2 of the questions at the beginning of the post.
Comfortable? Sure, I have the AC on and a bottle of Pepsi close at hand.
Satisfied? Hardly. The work I am doing I simply cannot be proud of. I will at no point open the site and show my Mom. It’s like doing the random shadow work of a CIA operative without the danger, excitement or tang. Nobody will ever see the work I did. No one will ever appreciate it.
Happy? Um, no. I find joy in creating. I also, through now fault of my own, I’m sure, define myself by what I do for a living. Right now, I am not liking being that person.

So, what’s the deal with the random, and totally misspelled title? Well, I do have good things anyway. The most dangerous thing in the world to long term happiness is being only 2 of the things I listed. Being Happy is the most important I assume, but you can be unhappy and comfortable, but happy with your comfort. This is dangerous as the hours turn to weeks turn to decades, and you realize that you’ve never been truly happy with yourself and where you life has taken you. In my case, I am unhappy just enough to want more. It’s enough to be tolerable, but it is more that enough to make me want to pursue my true passions. To finally be the person that I really want to be.

Maybe that’s too much. Maybe that’s too much emphasis. But people spend 5 days a week doing a job. Most spend more time doing that than they doing anything else. You aren’t a golfer, you aren’t a scholar, you aren’t a father. At least not in terms of hours. So big picture, I think what what a person does defines what they are. So why shouldn’t I define myself as something that makes me happy?

– In game news, I got the Cavern section of the 2nd level drawn out and have a good amount of it input into the system. I find that the more open levels of the Cavern are in deep contrast to the more confined prison levels, and they require a different level of design work. Since the screens will usually connect in multiple ways, I find that the level solutions may be outside the realm of a single screen and I have to be aware of that. For example, the solution I devise may require going up a certain way, but the next screen may give another way that wasn’t built into the puzzle. So I have to be aware of pieces that are “off” the board and think in larger, more spacial, terms.
For example. After drawing the level I realized that there was only 2 “Safe” places in the entire level where I could set a check point. Everywhere else was somewhere you could be killed by falling. Due to the nature of the system (it checks your position when you enter the check point screen and saves it) if you fall into the screen and die. It will reload and put you at the top of the screen. Which will probably also be less than survivable.

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